Three Extremely Lame Bits About Kid Flash

I have mentioned in the past that I really like the Kid Flash stories from the Silver Age; they were mostly "moral" stories, where Wally West (and the reader) learn a life lesson.

But I must note that there were three extremely lame points about Kid Flash that have to be covered in any detailed examination of Wally, who went on to become a long-term, significant character in the DC universe.

First, the origin. Now given that DC had decided to go with the youthful sidekick to the adult hero, the origin posed a bit of a problem. Remember, that Barry Allen had gained his super-speed via a freak accident. A bolt of lightning had hit some chemicals in his laboratory, and the combination had given him the "Fastest man alive" abilities. It's a million-to-one shot, but you know how it is, every bolt of lightning has to hit somewhere, right?

But hitting twice in the same spot? Lame:



Okay, so now they've accomplished what they wanted, which was to generate a sidekick for the Flash. But after awhile they realize that Kid Flash would be more effective (and distinctive) as a character if he had his own uniform. But do they just have him put something together himself? Not on your life:



In the story, Barry had been thinking about designing a new uniform for Wally, but before he could actually get out a needle and some thread, an alien weapon had automatically turned his thoughts into reality. No, I'm not kidding:



I seem to recall that Kid Flash later came up with some method of making his hair look brown instead of that rather distinctive carrot-top, as a secret identity bit of protection.

Now the last lame bit affects the Flash as well. Yep, I'm going there, to the story that undeniably ranks as the worst Flash story of the Silver Age. Now, when contemplating the awesome awfulness, remember that comics of the 1960s were still thought of as throwaway entertainment. The idea that adults 40+ years later would be be analyzing these stories would have seemed laughable to the people producing these comic books.

In Flash #167, we learned that the odds against the lightning bolt that gave the Flash his super-speed were even higher than we had thought:



And in fact, Barry apparently gained his superpowers from Mopee:



Leaving one obvious question for the readers:


But anybody logically looking at it would say that not only were the odds high against the lightning bolt that hit Kid Flash being random, but that the odds of it happening in front of the only other person in the world with super-speed were, well, about 3 billion to one. Which means that we have to assume that Mopee, or another one of the, gag, "Heavenly Helpmates", gave Wally West his Kid Flash powers.

Differently Abled

It is no secret that the comics of the Silver Age ignored lots of human beings in the real world. The characters were almost always Caucasians and invariably perfect specimens of humanity. It was a Lake Woebegone world, where all the children were above average. Oh, there were a few times that "different" people slipped in, but it was mostly in the public service announcements.

In Flash #133, we got a hint that was about to change:



(Note: Yes, there is a huge, glaring error in there, which I'll note at the end of the post.)

Kid Flash is supposed to appear at a camp for handicapped kids, who have dreamed up various tests of his abilities. Some of them seem a little odd, such as this one:



Maybe the kids were inspired by the race because they sensed that Kid Flash could have beaten them even if they were world-class athletes? And it turns out that the inspiration is going both ways:



Excuse me for a sec, I seem to have gotten something in my eye. But it gets even better, as it turns out that three of the boys have independently figured out that Kid Flash is actually Wally West (whom they all know from living in Blue Valley, his home town).



What will happen now? It was an almost ironclad law at DC that nobody could know any superhero's secret identity. In fact, if somebody discovered it, there were three different possible endings to the story:

1. They die
2. They get amnesia
3. They become convinced that they were wrong

Well, this time there was a fourth option:



Wow. Terrific story by John Broome and kudos to Julius Schwartz for allowing an unconventional ending to a secret identity tale. And this response a few issues later must have been very gratifying:



Error: See the splash page for the story, with the third kid saying "I can't speak..."? Obviously that was supposed to be a thought balloon.

Single Issue Review: Flash #156

These panels set the stage:



I love that little gag in the opening panel. Of course, the representatives are unconvinced until the alien demonstrates his powers, by turning everything in the room to gold. Somehow the representatives manage to restrain themselves from grabbing up everything in sight long enough to put out a call for the Flash. But he refuses to turn himself in.

The alien reveals that Barry Allen is the Flash in an effort to assist the authorities in their effort to capture him. Well, of course we pretty much assume that somehow now everybody will forget that Barry Allen is the Flash, so it creates an interesting puzzle for the reader: How do they get him out of this one?

At this point I'm thinking that the alien must not be who he appears to be; the most obvious candidates are Professor Zoom and Abra Cadabra. Since they are from the future they would know the Flash's secret identity. The turning the room into gold looks like a magic trick, which says it must be the latter.

Well, it made sense, but in fact the story is quickly revealed to be quite different. The alien is part of a group of tyrant aristocrats who have been defeated in a battle by their former serfs. They realize where they went wrong in the crucial moment, and plan to go back in time using the Flash and rectify that mistake.

They initially tried to take over Flash's mind, and came close. But he realized that their mind control only worked on him when he was traveling at very high speeds. So he had to slow down enough to prevent the mind control from working, while still going fast enough to accomplish his goal of creating a machine to defeat the mind control mechanism.

But now the alien's time limit is running out:



Wow. That is characterization done right! Kid Flash comes through:



So that Barry can use his full super-speed to foil the plot of the tyrants. But there remains the problem of everybody on Earth knowing Flash's secret identity.



Double wow. As you can probably guess, Iris gives her consent and the Flash eliminates the memory of his identity being revealed to everybody on the planet. As I covered in the past, Barry doesn't quite live up to his promise, but in another way he does.

Comments: A terrific story, absolutely a classic. Wonderful characterization in this story for Barry, Wally, and Iris. The usual superior artwork from Infantino combines perfectly with John Broome's fascinating script.